living and learning and loving the little things
I feel very naive and stupid. Perhaps thats a lot of what your 20s feel like. Having pipedreams and getting them broken over your head.
I'm trying to focus on the present moment for now. Life is so uncaringly spontaneous that trying to seriously plan out things even a year from now feels a little silly.
I don't want to let go of goals and savings plans and stuff like that. But I am trying to just take each day as it comes with the opportunities it grants me.
Today I am fortunate to work, to write, to go on bike rides, and to live with people and animals I love.
So that's what matters. I get to see my best friend in a few days and go to one of the MCR shows - which is insane.
I have lived most of my life caught up in what I want that I do not have, and that in the future I will be the person that I want. I see older people who seem to have done the same but for longer.
My biggest fear is that I will live always wanting more. And while certainly - there are many things I would like to change. The person I am right now is better than the person I have been, and the life I have now is better than the life I have had.
So I think the moment in time is worth appreciating. With all its struggles and issues. We made it this far, we can keep going.